I'm just going to throw this out here: without the help of ophthalmology, Chris is blind as a bat. Every once in a while, he'll throw on his old pair of glasses, but I'm not sure they're that much help, seeing as how the prescription was written when fanny packs were cool. The time finally came for Chris to get contacts.
While he was having his eyes examined, I was running wedding-related errands with my grandmother. When Chris was finished with his appointment, he called me up.
"Babe, I'm not sure if you knew this or not, but we're... surrounded... by MOUNTAINS!"
I couldn't help laughing out loud. Yeah, I was kinda aware of that. (We're surrounded by a 360 degree view of mountain ranges, even from our backyard.)
After I hung up with Chris, I had to explain to my grandmother what had caused the guffaw that made her jump out of her Reeboks. A look of panic swept across her face. "His eyesight was that bad? Oh no!"
"Isn't that hilarious?" I said. "I'm glad he finally got around to getting his eyes checked."
"Oh, me too," said my grandma. "And it's a good thing he's got two weeks to get used to how you really look before the wedding!"